Why you should NEVER tell a pregnant mother to not go in.

I was 35 weeks pregnant.
I woke up to absolutely no movement from my son.
I fought with myself for hours on whether or not I should go into the hospital.

I'm apart of quite a few mommy groups on Facebook, and in ALL of them, I have seen mothers asking for advice when they feel no movement from their baby. On EVERY post that relates to a mother feeling no movement, you'll see mothers say something along the lines of, "Your baby is growing and is running out of room. It's completely normal to not feel movement. Your baby is fine. S/he is probably sleeping. It's normal."

I replay that day multiple times a day, every single day. I remember thinking to myself, "ALL these moms say its normal. I shouldn't worry. But WHY am I worrying so much?"
I just had a stress test done 5 days ago. If I go into the hospital they're gonna think I'm crazy. They're gonna make fun of me. They're gonna think I'm being too protective and over reacting.. After all, not feeing your baby move at this point in pregnancy is "normal." -- Right?

I did everything. I drank soda. drank orange juice. laid on my left side. poked at him. talked to him. YELLED at him and nothing. I was scared. But, isn't it "normal"?

I knew the answers I would recive if I posted my fear on facebook, or in my mommy groups, or on my instagram. There was honestly a point where I even wrote these words on my facebook status, "I haven't felt my baby move all morning. Is this REALLY NORMAL? Is he sleeping more? growing more?" But I quickly erased it, because I knew better. I knew my baby. I knew what would get him to move. I knew I had to trust myself on this, even my own sister and husband made me feel like I was over reacting (while still telling me to do what I felt like I needed to do.) But really, there was no question about it. I knew I had to go right then.

I went in with the mindset that even if everything was fine, at least I could have a peace of mind. But my gut told me otherwise. My motherly instinct told me something was very wrong.

I arrived at the hospital at 1:00pm
My son was delivered by emergency C-section, at 2:05pm.

I remember as soon as he left my body. I remember hearing everyone yelling "Code Blue". He wasn't moving and it was not because, "he was running out of room". It was not because, "he was Sleeping." It was because he was dying. He was literally dying in my womb.

My body had completely failed my son. My body, was literally stealing my sons blood and not returning it through the umbilical cord. My son had LESS than 20% of his own blood. My son, came out completely lifeless. No crying. No movements. No heartbeat. Just white and limp.

It took 11 minutes to get him breathing. We almost lost him. We "should" have lost him.

THIS IS WHY, ITS SOOOOOO IMPORTANT to put a stop to the words, "It's normal to not feel movement."

If I had listened to 90% of what those moms say in my mommy group. I wouldn't have gone in and my son wouldn't be alive. He wouldn't have had the fighting chance.

I am BEGGING you to please, put a stop to telling moms to "not go in."


The only thing you should ever tell a mother who isn't feel her baby is, "As you get further along in your pregnancy, it is normal to feel a DIFFERENT kind of movement. but it is NOT normal, to not feel your baby at all."

 Movements change. But movements DO NOT STOP.

These mothers who are afraid, need the confidence that its okay to go in to have their baby be checked. Trust me when I say, Doctors and Nurses would much rather have you come in 10 X's a day just for a peace of mind, than coming in when its too late.

Don't be the person, who is part of the reason, to why a mother losses her baby.

Because reality check, you definitely would be part of the reason, as to why shell never take her baby home, by being too late. Because she chose to listen to your advice. Because you encouraged her that  "feeling no movement is normal."

PUT A STOP TO THE WORDS, "Feeling no movement is normal."


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